Change comes at a price that you may not want to pay?

Most of the people that I come into contact with want some things to be different. They want to change something. It is interesting how they express that desire in negative context. In other words they will tell you want is happening that is causing them stress and will tell you that they don’t want it any more. You may have noticed something here. They are clear that they are not...

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The eternal pessimist. Vol1 The joys of misery.

It is not easy to maintain a state of joy whilst being surrounded by people who enjoy revelling in misery. Have you noticed the ones that no matter where you take the conversation they want to bring it back on a subject that revolves around some miserable perspective. It is as if that is all they live for. But then that is what life is for them; misery = life. The eternal pessimist has...

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Some people “fake it to make it” and remain a fake. Sincerity comes at a cost of leaving ourselves open to the elements.

The phrase “fake it till you make it” is not something I wholeheartedly believe. It seems to me that those who think that just by faking being someone they are are not or having an ability that they do not have, somehow, miraculously, it just manifests. I spend time observing people and often just absorb their energy. By energy I am not talking about some spiritual happening,...

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Beginnings and endings. How can you have one without the other.

How is it that we so want things to be different but want not to change? It is as if we want to eat a pear whilst continuing to bite the apple. At the same time we have our hands full of apples and are not prepared to let go . Logic, which from time to time can come in useful, tells us that unless we empty our hands of whatever it is we are holding we can not pick something else up. Yet we...

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I just want to be normal that’s all I want just to have a normal life with normal people.

There are many occasion when clients who come to see me say they just want to be normal.  Normal!  What’s normal?  The conversation  takes a turn when we start to talk about normal and what normal looks like. It is strange that when we talk  about the concept of normal very few people are able to define something that is  easily understood and therefore not easily attainable. Often...

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Thinking about change is not enough.

So many of the people I meet and treat are trapped by a simple yet illusive misconception; that thinking about change is enough. Whist thinking about change is admirable there is no substitute for action. Often I hear about what people are going to do. The thing where attention needs to be focused is the action that people take and the steps that follow. So many people squander time with wishful...

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