Beginnings and endings. How can you have one without the other.

How is it that we so want things to be different but want not to change? It is as if we want to eat a pear whilst continuing to bite the apple. At the same time we have our hands full of apples and are not prepared to let go .

Logic, which from time to time can come in useful, tells us that unless we empty our hands of whatever it is we are holding we can not pick something else up. Yet we persist, insist, whinge and whine that we want something to be different.

When we are asking for something new in life, we are asking for something new to start. We want something to begin. We want a new beginning. It seems preposterous to think that this can occur without something coming to end. It seems that no matter how small, something will need to come to an end.

Life is filled with beginnings and endings. One without the other is not possible. Change is happening all around us whether we like it or not. At the very least once the moment has passed it can not be re experienced in the same way. Time waits for no one. Having decided that we want something different to what we are currently getting, we need to focus on the direction that we need to take. Changing directions requires that we let go of what we have to a lesser or greater degree.

The fear of not getting what we want keeps us holding on to what we have got.  Yes, there is a risk in changing, just as there is a risk in not changing.  Some may decide to play it safe and stay in a relationship that is un-fulfilling with a “better the devil you know” attitude – and settle for what they are getting.  It is not wrong in choosing to stay in the relationship even though it is not fulfilling. Where it can be damaging, is if whilst we are in such a relationship we continue to complain and “wish” that things could be different. Better to accept that this is life and to move on to find an attitude that works.

On the other hand, you can help by weighing up the possibilities and accept that you might need to end something to start something. In other words, without an ending, there is unlikely to be a beginning.

Remember life is filled with beginnings and ending. When thinking back over the years, it is possible that you are likely to be grateful that some things ended.  It may be useful to notice that beginnings and endings are just part of the big picture of change.